Men, this may not seem like a normal post for men of the sword, but as I reflect on our adoption of Jeffrey and Alicia, it teaches me much about God’s adoption of us. I wanted to share some of my reflections with other men.
Yesterday was adoption day! No, you won’t find it on any calendar. This is a personal celebration day in our home. One year ago, we sat in front of the judge and Jeffrey and Alicia officially became part of our family. We still celebrate birthdays, but adoption day is a very meaningful day for us as well. It culminated several long years of preparation, waiting, and seeing God work in amazing ways. As we were talking at lunch (yes, McDonalds with a play area to celebrate), I was telling them that mommy and daddy were adopted too! Not by our earthly families, but by God as He adopted us to be His son and daughter. In fact everyone who believes in Jesus Christ is adopted into the family! So we not only celebrate adoption day for Jeffrey and Alicia, but for each of us as a child of God.
It is amazing how many of the parts of that official adoption ceremony apply to us as children of God. I can still clearly recall the look of the courtroom as we sat in the front row in front of the judge with kids in tow. There was a sense of respect and a little fear as this man normally is dispensing justice and making difficult decisions in the eyes of those who cannot care for their children. I recall Prov 9:10, The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy One is insight. God is a righteous, just God, but also a God of love. Fear Him. Be in awe of Him. He and the bailiff were in good spirits as they made some small talk and prepared to start. Adding children to loving families is the best part of their job. Our families were with us to commemorate the additions to the family. It helped me picture the celebration in heaven when one more comes to Christ and is added to the family. (Luke 15:10)
During the ceremony, the words spoken were full of meaning to Susie and I. Seven phrases in particular stood out and have meaning to us as we understand the depth of what God has done for us.
1. “Jeffrey and Alicia will be treated as your legal children, the same as your natural children with rights to inheritance and to be supported by you. Do you accept those responsibilities and obligations?”
Adoption meant bringing these two precious lives completely into the family. It is not a partial, temporary decision. Rather, they are my children as much as Mark is my child. We are agreeing to support and include them in the family with all rights of a son and daughter because they ARE our son and daughter. They never have to worry about being disowned or somehow being less a part of the family. What a wonderful picture of God’s work to adopt us into His family with all rights and permanence associated with that adoption. When we believe and trust Christ, we ARE His sons and daughters and we WILL receive the inheritance of eternal life with Him. (1 Pet 1:3-4)
Rom 8:16-17 The Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, 17 and if children, then heirs—heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with him in order that we may also be glorified with him.
2. “Do you enter into this agreement willingly and voluntarily?”
It was important to the judge to know that we wanted Jeffrey and Alicia to be part of our family and were choosing to make them such. We love them so much that we chose to make them part of our family when there was no reason we had to. It was a willing decision that speaks to their worth. They are wanted, not abandoned. The same is true with God’s adoption of His children. He chose us! Not because He had to, but because He wanted to. If we question our worth, we are questioning the decision of the Almighty God. Praise God He loves us and chose us! He chose to go to the cross and pay the price to make us His own. (John 10:17-18, 1 Pet 2:9-10)
1 Thes 1:4 For we know, brothers loved by God, that he has chosen you,
Eph 1:5 he predestined us for adoption as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will,
3. “My Mark, My Effrey”
This was Alicia’s answer to the judge regarding her thoughts about her brothers and her new family. After some laughter and ahhhs, we thought about how profound her answer was. This is family. Both Mark and Jeffrey are her brothers. Why wouldn’t they be? It really is that simple. She will often say things like, “We do that because we a family!” My prayer is that we view each other in the church that same way. We are a family and that brings certain expectations of behavior. Every other believer is my brother or sister because we are all adopted and as Alicia would say, “We a family!” May we have that same joy, comfort, and love for our fellow adopted siblings in the kingdom of God.
1 Pet 1:22-23a Having purified your souls by your obedience to the truth for a sincere brotherly love, love one another earnestly from a pure heart, 23 since you have been born again,
4. “The court finds and orders that the children’s interests will be promoted by the adoption.”
At this point in the ceremony, the judge started making some official declarations making the adoption legal. It was an emotional moment that I have difficulty describing. It was a combination of awesome, weighty, and momentous all at the same time. The first is that Jeffrey’s and Alicia’s wellbeing and interests will be benefited from adoption. They will be better off by being adopted. This is significant because part of the court’s responsibility is to make sure that the children that are wards of the state be placed in homes that will watch out for them and take care of them. How much more when we are adopted as children of God. We think we know what is best for ourselves and our sinful man defaults to self-centeredness. However, the only true way our interests are promoted are by following the King of Kings. He knows what is best and He is good. We may not see how things are working out, but in His sovereign plan, our interests are taken care of because our Father will be glorified. No one else, including ourselves, can take care of what we need. So because dad is faithful, we can trust and let go of worry! (Matt 6:25-34)
Rom 8:28 And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.
5. “The children are now the lawful children of the petitioners.”
At exactly this moment, Jeffrey’s and Alicia’s status changed. They were now our children. They did not earn this or fight for this. We as the parents were the petitioners and everything changed because of that petition. In the same way, God declares us justified in a judicial act where the work of Christ on the cross is applied to us. In that moment, our status changes. We are then redeemed, adopted children and no longer slaves to sin. We have done nothing to earn grace, but by His work and His power it is possible. Praise God that we as believers are now “lawful children of the petitioner.”
Gal 4:5-7 to redeem those who were under the law, so that we might receive adoption as sons. And because you are sons, God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, crying, “Abba! Father!” So you are no longer a slave, but a son, and if a son, then an heir through God.
6. “The names of the children shall be Alicia Ruth Johnson and Jeffrey Titus Johnson.”
When I heard these words, the chills came over me and tears came to my eyes. The change of names culminated their journey into our family. They were Johnsons with all that the name entails! I was extending my reputation, name, and heritage to them for the rest of their lives. The change of a name is no small thing. We chose their middle names intentionally. Ruth became family with Naomi and they were faithful to each other. Titus was a servant of God under Paul’s tutelage and was described as his true child in the faith and his partner and fellow worker. Our prayer for Jeffrey is that he serves God with all his heart. When God gives us His name, it shows that we are His and no longer our own. It also means that we represent the name of God and are to represent Him well. By giving us His name, God says, “You are mine.” Wow! (Acts 15:14-18)
Is 62:2 The nations shall see your righteousness, and all the kings your glory, and you shall be called by a new name that the mouth of the Lord will give.
Rev 22:4 They will see his face, and his name will be on their foreheads.
7. “The court vacates all future hearings and terminates the dependency.”
With this short statement, the court was giving up all its rights to Jeffrey and Alicia. There would be no more visits, no more court dates, and no more directives on how to raise our children. We would no longer have to face the possibility that the process could be stopped and our children taken out of our home. We breathed a sigh of relief as it was like a heavy burden falling off our backs. We could be a family. This is a great picture of what God has freed us from when He adopted us into His family. We are no longer enslaved to sin, but have the Holy Spirit indwelling us helping us say no to sin. Death and hell no longer have power over us. We will spend eternity with our Heavenly Father. There are no future hearings with the accuser because Jesus will step in and say He paid the price. There is no more dependency to sin. May we take heart and live like children of the King! Oh death, where is your victory? God has given victory! I’m proud to be adopted. (Rom 6:17-18)
Rom 6:6-7 We know that our old self was crucified with him in order that the body of sin might be brought to nothing, so that we would no longer be enslaved to sin. 7 For one who has died has been set free from sin.
Rom 8:15 For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, “Abba! Father!”
Seven little statements and everything has changed. This last year has brought many changes, challenges, joys, and much growth for all of us. God is good and faithful. As I reflect, I can’t remember or even imagine when I didn’t have three children. As Alicia would say, “We a family!” God has said the same thing.
I love how intently you took all that in, Ron. It shows your and Susie’s devotion to Jeffrey and Alicia being added to your family as much as if you were the proud parents in the delivery room documenting everything of their birth with photos like you were able to do for Mark. I didn’t know you had the option to assign them middle names. Great choices.